all right

Occasionally adding corroborative details to add verisimilitude to otherwise bald and unconvincing,
but veridicous accounts
with careful attention, indefatigable assiduity, and nice discrimination.
Showing posts with label the very silly Tim Flannery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the very silly Tim Flannery. Show all posts

14 October, 2013

“Where’s the Wascally Warming?”

A transcript of the Climate Council’s search for hidden global warming.

In his well-appointed office, the very silly Prof. Tim Flannery is becoming more and more frustrated.
Prof. Tim Flannery:  Warming? I know you’re somewhere, Global Warming; please stop hiding.  Warming?  Where are you?  All right, warming, we’ve had our fun, but it’s time to stop hiding now.  Are you there?  Look, I’ve had enough of this, so I’m going now.  [He walks to his door noisily.]  This is the sound of my leaving.  Yes, I’m heading out the door right now.  [He slams the door.]  Okay, everyone’s gone now.  You can come out now.  HEY!  Look, it’s no use pretending you’re not here because I know you exist—or, more to the point, I’ve been telling anyone who might send me a bob or two that you exist.  [He whistles.]  Here, Warming!  Warming?  COME ON, WARMING!  WARMING, COME OUT RIGHT NOW OR I’LL GET MIGHTY ANGRY WITH YOU!  Oh, please stop hiding.  Are you in the thermosphere?  Are you concealed by those pesky, democratic ants?  Are you, perhaps, under— [he lifts his couch] THIS COUCH?  Are you in my wallet?  No.  Are you there at all, Global Warming?  Please, I know you’re here somewhere!  Answer me!
Prof. Will Steffen[from behind an armchair I’m in the deep oceans!
Prof. Tim Flannery:  Warming? I knew you existed!  Hey, wait a bit; you sounded just a little like my fellow propagandist of climate doom, Will Steffen.  Was that you, Will?
Prof. Will Steffen[giggling]  Not at all!
Prof. Tim Flannery:  So it really is you, Global Warming? Proof at last!  Hang on, if you’re hiding in the deep oceans I shouldn’t be able to hear you—  [Flannery sees Steffen crouching behind the chair.]  What?  Professor, I have better things to do than play games; I’m going away!  [Flannery stomps to the door, slams it shut without leaving, tiptoes over to his desk, and crouches down under it.]
Prof. Will Steffen[rising slowly Oh, I so wanted to find Global Warming too.  I hope that I didn’t hurt Tim’s feelings; not that it matters, of course, because, frankly, he’s a bit of a loony cove.  I do wonder where Global Warming is sequestered or secreted or lying low.  Hallo?  Global Warming, it’s no use hiding because I can see you!  Come out, come out, wherever you are!  Can you hear me?  Are you in this room, Global Warming? 
Prof. Tim Flannery [giggling]  No!  I’m not!
Prof. Will Steffen:  Oh, darn; I’ll have to look somewhere else then.  [Steffen exits.]

UPDATE (16 October):  meanwhile, throughout the land, followers of the two silly but greedy professors have gullibly accepted those duplicitous propagandists’ pseudo-scientific, fallacious, self-serving arguments, and foolishly expect to rely on giant-whirligigs for their power in the future:

25 October, 2012

“It’s a Good Idea”

In olden times, our ancestors thought, in their ignorance, that a public official’s own self-interest should not be the major factor in determining how that official might disburse taxpayers’s funds; in modern, enlightened times, however, governments have decided that ministers are most qualified both to establish what might constitute prudent fiscal responsibility and to determine whether their own friends and families ought to obtain lavish perquisites at the public’s expense.  Australia’s foreign minister, Sen. Bob Carr, for instance, considers it “a good idea” that Australians—who, sadly, are already burdened by an incompetent, imprudent federal government with its stupid, ruinous “carbon” tax—should pay for his wife to jet all over the world; the rest of us, of course, must meekly accept such well-argued, disinterested reasoning.  Similarly, Sen. Stephen Conroy excuses spending untold milliards of dollars on a scheme to provide a few thousand people an inordinately expensive, and soon to be outdated, “national broadband network” solely on his uninformed suspicion that “it’s a good idea”.
We can surely suppose, then, that the Government has used the “good idea” criterion for other decisions:
Minister:  So, professor, you say that the world is warming dangerously, though no data support your contention, that the seas will rise catastrophically, though there be no evidence for that either, that we shall suffer continuous droughts and endless summers, that millions of “climate refugees” will die on our shores, and that, in order to stop all this, or at least to whine about it publicly, we should appoint you to head a “climate commission”, part time, at a salary of a quarter a million a year, plus expenses?
Tim Flannery:  I think that it’s a good idea.
Minister:  All right, then.
Prime Minister:  So, though we have few trained installers ready, and no carefully considered plan, you want hundreds or even thousands of millions of dollars to provide financial incentives for people to install insulation in their houses quickly (though you’re surely aware that any shonky fly-by-night outfit might consider it a licence to exploit people), in the pious but unexamined hope that such spending will stimulate the economy (as least in those parts of China providing cheap but ineffective insulation materials) because the certain reduction of their heating bills is insufficient encouragement at the moment for householders to insulate their roofs?
Peter Garrett:  I reckon it’s a good idea.
Prime Minister:  All right, then.
Prime MinisterIn addition to the “carbon” tax, which does nothing for the environment, but does raise the cost of living for all Australians, you want us to impose more taxes on some companies within the mining sector (which largely funds our economic growth and exorbitant spending), though it might actually reduce mining and its profitability and thereby reduce our revenues?
Treasurer Wayne Swan:  I think that it’s a good idea,
Prime Minister:  All right, then.
Prime Minister:  In order to embarrass the leader of the Opposition, you want to misreport what he said, to protesting Aboriginal activists, in the hope that they will be enraged, organise a race riot, and attempt to assault him at a venue wherein I am also intending to appear?
Senior Adviser:  I think that it’s a good idea.
Prime Minister:  All right, then.
We can also surmise that other decisions by “progressive” governments, such as whether to protect an ambassador in Libya or just to let him be assassinated, are made with equivalent rigour.
Perhaps defendants may hope that the judges, appointed by such incompetent governments, may be equally receptive to such intelligent reasoning:
JudgeIt is established by incontrovertible evidence that you defrauded your union’s members, you misappropriated further funds by deception, you stole, you cheated, you lied, you calumniated others in order to deflect just criticism of your abominable peculations and reprehensible iniquities, and yet you still claim that you’re not guilty?
Defendant:  I thought at the time that it was a good idea.
Judge:  All right, then; I find you not guilty; you are free to go.
UPDATE I:  see “Carr: my wife’s cheekbones won it for Australia”, by Andrew Bolt, and (linked therein) “Foreign Minister Bob Carr’s wife Helena has cost taxpayers $120,000 in six months on overseas trips”, from AAP.

UPDATE II (26 October):  see also “Unelected Foreign Minister’s Wife Spends $120K in 6 Months”, by Philippa Martyr, as well as her “Unsolicited Advice to Mrs Bob Carr”.

UPDATE III (26 October):  in response to a comment, on Prof. Bunyip’s “Suddenly, the Sounds of Silence”, suggesting that “the odd cocktail and stir fry” for Sen. Carr’s wife, would not “do much damage to our already seriously damaged economy”, I posted:
Even supposing that the costs of two people staying in luxurious accommodation are not much different from the cost of one person staying in luxurious accommodation (which I doubt), a major problem here is that if the senator’s wife cost the taxpayer only an extra dollar a year, rather than at least $120,000 in six months, it would still be too much; ministers of the Crown and public servants should not be adding to the public purse at any time unless with sound reasoning and with appropriate authorisation.
The sort of deplorable thinking, whereby every tea-room of a department might be provided with fancy coffee-maker and hi-fi system, or every teacher with a “free” computer, or every parliamentarian with a part-time assistant straight out of a political-science major with a salary twice or thrice that of a bloke who labours hard all day actually making stuff, on the fallacious grounds that it’s only a pittance and doesn’t amount to so much really, is part of the sloppy, imprudent, improvident thinking, I submit, which has led to our seriously damaged economy.

01 December, 2011

Shock “Climate Change” News: Media Bias!

Many journalists, such as those of The Power Index, continue to produce partisan drivel whilst claiming to be able to identify bias.  Matthew Knott, for instance, stupidly asserts:
it’s worth pointing out that six parliamentary and scientific committees into the original ‘climate-gate’ emails found no evidence of fraud or scientific misconduct on behalf* of the climate scientists involved.
The useless Matthew Knott hasn’t yet ascertained—because, no doubt, the incompetent hack has not bothered to check—that no impartial inquiry has yet been established to investigate whether “climate scientists” ever acted inappropriately.  If Knott actually stopped wanking over pictures of Julia Gillard or the evil stalinist, Jew-hating witch, Lee Rhiannon (or, perhaps, Bob Brown), whilst vacuously accepting what his biassed sources tell him, but instead studied the “Climategate” e-mails, the indolent, ignorant dupe could see for himself clear evidence of dishonesty, fraud and gross misconduct.
Lucy Clark must have spent a busy minute or two mining a methodologically shonky report, A Sceptical Climate: Media coverage of climate change in Australia 2011: Part 1—Climate Change Policy, from Wendy Bacon, a professor of journalism:
An extensive study examining coverage of the carbon tax debate has found that News Limited papers crossed the line from reporting to campaigning.  Sydney’s highest-selling paper, The Daily Telegraph, was most hostile to the policy, with 89% of articles expressing negativity and only 11% being positive about the tax.
Negativity?  Oh no, how dare those naughty media!  On a not dissimilar note, I recently examined some modern reporting on Falangists, Fascists and Nazis, as well as reports detailing convictions of murderers, rapists and arsonists, and was dismayed to discern predominant negativity!  Why wasn’t the ratio of positive to negative stories 50/50?
“Both The Daily Telegraph and The Herald Sun were so biased in their coverage it is fair to say they campaigned against the policy, rather than covered it,” writes report author Wendy Bacon, a professor of journalism at the Australian Centre of Independent Journalism.
“Many Australians did not receive fair, accurate and impartial reporting in the public interest in relation to the carbon policy in 2011.”
Of course, writing for the Murdoch-hating Power Index, Lucy Clark first noticed that News was sledged:
An extensive study examining coverage of the carbon tax debate has found that News Limited papers crossed the line from reporting to campaigning.
According to Bacon, “The Age was the only newspaper whose coverage was more positive than negative.”  Hang on, isn’t positive coverage as much campaigning as negative coverage?  Let us see more of that report which The Power Index esteems so highly:
There are few media stories in which there is such an obvious public interest as that of climate change.  [p. 3]
Really?  Considering that the climate has always changed, and always will, some may find that assessment puzzling; but we might interpret “climate change” as “the conjecture of anthropogenic global warming” (AGW) which is of some public interest—particularly to those credulous chumps who uncritically accept the notion which activist proponents of catastrophic AGW shout at any opportunity:  that industrial emissions of CO2 are causing all sorts of nasty climatic changes.  The report’s lazy use of the term “climate change” to mean AGW demonstrates the bias of the report because, for the most part, “climate change” is the preferred terminology of propagandists of AGW, of political parties which purport to believe in AGW (sufficiently, at least, to propose “carbon” emission schemes, and the like), and of the gullibly compliant media.
There is no doubt that the subject has been well covered by the media.  [p. 3]
No doubt?  Bacon concludes her report’s Preface by asserting:
the quality of reporting on the critical issue of climate change provides a litmus test in seeking answers to the Inquiry’s terms of reference.  [p. 5]
The main use of litmus is to test whether a solution be acidic or alkaline.  So, in other words, the standard of the reporting on the allegedly pressing matter of anthropogenic global warming constitutes a simple method of determining acidity or alkalinity within the search for answers not to questions but to terms of reference.  That’s clear.  It’s no wonder that she teaches journalism.  Of course, she could test her own skills some time.  (They are, talking of litmus tests, quite base.  Notice, for instance, that Bacon has never quite come to grips with the adequate placing of commas.)
The words used to describe issues influence the way it is discussed [sic—better, surely, would be either “they are” instead of “it is” or “an issue” instead of “issues”, but this comes from a professor of journalism who considers media to be singular].  The carbon emissions reduction policy was originally referred to as the carbon pricing policy, although[,] from the beginning, the Opposition leader Tony Abbott from [sic] referred to it as a ‘tax’.  Under questioning, Prime Minister Julia Gillard agreed on February 24 that the policy would be “effectively like a tax” (7.30 Report, 24 Feb 2011).  [p. 12]
The PM called the “carbon” tax a tax on many previous occasions, most famously when she promised that she would not introduce one, because it is indeed a tax and not a price.  A price is the amount of money (or its equivalent) which must be given in payment for some good or service; a tax is a compulsory contribution to the State, levied on income or profits, or added to the cost of goods or services.  If I had no CO2 and wanted to buy some, I should pay a price therefor; if, however, I already had some CO2 and the government insisted that I owed them a fee for having produced the beneficent gas which is essential for life on Earth, that would be a tax.  Calling a tax on some industrial emissions of CO2 “a price on carbon” is a politically biassed decision; that Wendy Bacon fails (or pretends to fail) to realise this terminological inexactitude is ipso facto partisan demonstrates how lamentably prejudiced she is.  Partisan terminology used by the media to describe issues, I’m led to believe, will influence the way those issues are then discussed by the public.
Bacon also ignores how much “climate change” and “global warming” are omnipresent notions throughout the media.  One can hardly watch a documentary on SBS, for example, or even a sports or cooking show, without hearing off-hand remarks which are predicated on the silly assumption that catastrophic AGW is definitely proven.  She also ignores the pictures which can severally convey a thousand words of propaganda.  Even articles unrelated to “climate change” can, with a doctored or misleading picture or two—of dark, foreboding steam, say, from looming, sinister cooling towers—indoctrinate the scaremongering of the awarmists.
Negative arguments against the policy were strongly focused on the impact of the policy on the Australian economy.  [p.13]
It is amazing how some assessments of a tax (which would do nothing for the environment—based on the admissions from the Government’s own ministers and the incompetent Climate Commissioner—but would instead lead to increased costs of goods and services) concentrated not on the non-existing virtues of the tax but on rational forecasts of consequent economic damage!
Fairfax newspapers did not publish any opinion articles by climate sceptics about climate policy, [sic] during this period.  [p. 16]
That’s a good thing?  Also, what exactly is a climate sceptic?
Promoting sources with vested interests without testing them [sic] against credible sources provides opportunities for misinformation and scare campaigns.  [p. 19]
That sentence could be intended to mean, I suppose:  “Relying on claims from sources with vested interests in any complex, controversial issue, without testing the accuracy of such claims, could help promulgate misinformation and even assist in partisan propaganda campaigns which willfully foster unjustified fears.”  How much effort, then, we may well wonder, has the semi-literate Bacon applied to testing (perhaps with litmus paper) the sources of all those farfetched claims that slightly more atmospheric CO2 might calamitously alter the world’s overall climate any day now?  Within Australia, after all, much misinformation and fear-mongering propaganda recently came from the Australian Greens, and their minions, as well as the most incompetent federal Government in history, passed on by those supercilious lap-poodles, the Canberra press.  Just because moronic ministers such as Sen. Wong constantly claim that the opposition is running a scare campaign—in between her usual emesis of more poppycock about rising seas and flooded lands and deadly warmth and apocalyptic coolth and the supposed consensus of the world’s most fraudulent pseudo-scientists—does not make it true.  Remember, during the last federal election campaign, when the Treasurer, the Hon. Wayne Swan, accused the Leader of the Opposition of making “hysterical allegations” after the latter claimed, correctly, that the Gillard Government would introduce a “carbon” tax?  Remember when the late Robyn Williams predicted that seas would rise by over one hundred metres?  Remember when the very silly Tim Flannery foresaw that Adelaide would run out of water by 2009? Remember when Bob Brown asseverated that Australia was in permanent drought?  The proctoleichous Wendy Bacon, that half-smoked, useless, inexpert, unprofessional, galegnathous, ham-fisted toady, cannot spot misinformation or fear-mongering when promulgated by those whose politics she supports; she notices alleged misinformation or purported scare campaigns only when supposedly coming from those whom she already despises.
Meanwhile, the ABC (whilst steadfastly refusing to mention the “Climategate e-mails) continues to warn us that climate change will doom us all... 

UPDATE I:  seeGillard EXPO-ed!”, by Michael Kile, at Quadrant Online:
Less than twenty-four hours after the government’s Clean Energy Legislative Package was passed by the Senate just after midday on the 8th November, the prime minister celebrated her Year of Decision and Delivery with a victory speech to the Carbon Expo Australasia 2011 conference.
It was, the PM said, an historic day; a day on which “the federal parliament landed our nation on the right side of history.”  Carbon (dioxide) pricing will be the magic key that unlocks the door to the nation’s “clean energy future”.  There had been, however, some bumps along the way.  [...]
The PM understood why many Australians were anxious about the government’s legislated carbon (dioxide) price. The other side’s fear-mongering on the issue was sickening.  They were full of “rash, irresponsible talk”.  “Their sole intention is to cause damage by corroding certainty and seeing investment deferred.” Her fear-mongering, however, was in a different class.  It had an apocalyptic dimension.  So she was not going to sit back and accept the slings and arrows of our outrageous climate without a fight.  [...]
The other side, the PM stressed, was guilty of “distortion of facts and the trashing of science”.  It was “playing to short-term political advantage to the detriment of the national interest.”  In its “bizarre parallel universe”, there was “juvenile talk of repeal and promises etched in blood, with fingers firmly crossed behind their backs as they are made.”
In her side’s parallel universe, the PM’s favourite planet, Hyperbole, revolves precariously on the edge of a black hole of scepticism.  Here, she said, there was reason, creativity and innovation.  Here was the “ability to see solutions where once there were only problems”.  Here, there was no distortion of facts, no trashing of science, no contradictions, no obfuscation—and no Climategate 1 & 2 emails [...]. Here the ruling elite had mastered the knowledge (or so it said) to engineer a “stable” climate, one (like Goldilocks’s porridge) just right for the planet’s inhabitants.
UPDATE II (2 December):  meanwhile, according to Malcolm Holland of The Daily Telegraph:
Senior bureaucrats in the state government’s environment department have routinely stopped publishing scientific papers which challenge the federal government’s claims of sea level rises threatening Australia’s coastline, a former senior public servant said yesterday.
UPDATE III (2 December)from Bishop Hill, quoting the awarmist BBC, comes another example of excellence in both climate science and reporting:
The drought that has affected parts of England since June will last into next summer if there is insufficient winter rain, the Environment Agency has said.
UPDATE IV (2 December)do listen here to Marc Morano of Climate Depot chatting “about the latest from the world of crimatology” on The Corbett Report.CO2

UPDATE V (2 December)from The Washington Post’s editorial (of 29 November), “A climate of fraud”:
The latest release of 5,000 emails from the University of East Anglia’s Climatic Research Unit (CRU) reconfirms what the 2009’s “Climategate” files established:  Global warming is more fiction than science.  [...]
Warmists dismiss the leaked emails or complain they have been taken out of contextNot so.  Collectively, the emails provide evidence of various crimes against the scientific method, such as concealed or destroyed source data, selective measurement, predetermined conclusions, hidden funding sources and bowing to government influence.  They knew they were doing wrong and sought to hide the evidence.  “One way to cover yourself,” wrote professor Phil Jones, head of the CRU, “would be to delete all emails at the end of the process.  Hard to do, as not everybody will remember to do it.”  Fortunately for science, Mr. Jones was, for once, correct.
UPDATE VI (2 December)see Andrew Bolt’s “Bacon fried on warming coverage”.

UPDATE VII (3 December):  Gavin Atkins also examines Bacon’s self-supposed fairness in “How independent is the Centre for Independent Journalism?”.

UPDATE VIII (5 December)see Tim Blair’s “Spendy Wendy”:
For whatever reason, Bacon and her team of researchers—some thirteen or so were involved in compiling the report—decline to dwell on the government’s obvious reversal of policy.  Dishonest government is evidently less important to academics than is criticism of that government.
Some of the basic assumptions in Bacon’s report are intriguing.  “Climate change has been a hot topic in the Australian media for several years,” she writes, “not so much because it threatens the planet but because of the tense political struggle over how the Australian government should respond.”
So the planet itself is threatened.  Not just low-lying island populations or coast-dwelling Australians or poley bears, but the earth itself.  Note that Bacon implies doubt over the Prime Minister’s carbon tax promise, but exaggerates climate change concerns to the point that the planet may cease to be.  The joint may have survived for 4.6 billion years, but a couple of degrees of temperature change are going to blast it out of space.
UPDATE IX (5 December)the ABC has, at last, graciously condescended to permit mention of the recently released Climategate II e-mails in “Leaked emails confirm climate change questions”:
A Newcastle University professor, whose research questions the science behind climate change says he feels vindicated by recent leaked emails from an international expert on the subject.
Stewart Franks says there is no evidence that carbon dioxide drives global warming and he blames the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change for scaring people about a future climate catastrophe.
For the past decade Professor Franks has focussed his research on natural variability in climate as being the driver of extreme droughts and rain events, rather that CO2 emissions.
He says the emails from Kevin Trenberth from the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, show fundamental flaws in their methodology, but the public is being kept in the dark.
Professor Franks says he believes the emails support his own argument that natural variability is responsible for warming.
“Now I’ve been criticised for talking about these modes that we’ve barely beginning to understand as somehow being some kind of a denier of climate change or a pure contrarian,” he said.
“But it is really heartening to see that these scientists actually acknowledge [sic] and in fact one scientist went as far as to say ‘What if all the warming we actually see is just natural multi-decadal variability?’
“He then said, ‘They’ll probably kill us’.
“I think we do need an independent and judicial review of the evidence both for and against the likelihood of climate change beyond naturally catastrophic climate variability.
“I must say the IPCC is far too sullied by the leaks and some of the shenanigans that the emails show have be going on.
“It is now too sullied to be credible.”
UPDATE X (6 December):  you might notice that Wendy Bacon just loves to determine the hydrogen ion concentration of media:  in “Coverage of phone hacking scandal – a litmus test for News Ltd”, back in July, she was finding problems with News Ltd because, though linked to Fairfax and the ABC, and a grovelling apologist for the Gillard government, she’s so independent:
This week, Jenna Price and I published a small Australian Centre for Independent Journalism study on the coverage of the phone hacking scandal in Australia on The Conversation [sic] a new publishing venture from the Australian university and research sector.  [...]
It was great to see our story taken up by ABC site, The Drum.
The Australian Centre for Independent Journalism, by the way, according to its website:
works with reporters and associates who are interested in producing journalism that reveals the complex, multi-faceted nature of Australian society, and its position as a Pacific Rim nation, in an independent and critical fashion.
If it were not for such independent journalism, I’d never have known that Australian society (or, perhaps, journalism) has a position as a Pacific Rim nation.

UPDATE XI (6 December)for $1,490 (or only $1,140 for some), you too can be taught how to make a mess of punctuation or how to spell subeditor as two unhyphenated words; but, judging from the spiel, you’ll not learn how to avoid contempt:
Learn to select appropriate stories for your readership; write strong headlines and captions; edit with authority for different readerships and capture attention with attractive page layout and design.
This course covers the fundamentals of sub-editing, proofreading, layout and design for print publications.  Topics covered include understanding your readers, story selection, copy editing news and feature stories, writing headlines and captions, marking copy, proofreading and avoiding defamation and contempt.  Basic concepts of page layout and design using industry standard InDesign will also be covered.
People who edit articles, put together newsletters or magazines and/or need to learn about the role of a sub editor will benefit from attending.  People who would like to become freelance sub editors would also benefit.

UPDATE XII (8 December):  for an account of the BBC’s egregious bias, see Christopher Booker’s “BBC’s bias on global warming: An inconvenient truth on climate change:
In 2009, the BBC’s journalists could scarcely hide their dismay at the collapse of the UN’s great Copenhagen climate conference, which planned to cut the world’s ‘carbon emissions’ to such an extent it would have landed mankind with the biggest bill in history, at an estimated cost of hundreds of trillions of pounds.
They tried to brush aside the huge embarrassment of the so-called ‘Climategate’ row in 2009 when hundreds of emails from the Climate Research Unit in Norwich were posted online and which revealed how some of the top scientists had been fiddling their data.
They downplayed scandals erupting round the IPCC when it was revealed that many of its more alarming predictions had not been based on proper science at all, but only on scare stories dreamed up by environmental lobby groups.
Then, last summer, in a bid to justify its conduct, the BBC Trust commissioned one of the Corporation’s regular contributors, the geneticist Professor Steve Jones, to review its science coverage, notably on climate change. Professor Jones made the astonishing claim that the only problem with the coverage of climate change was not that it was too biased, but that it wasn’t biased enough.
All this is why I am far from alone in concluding that the BBC’s coverage has, on this key issue of our time, gone hopelessly off the rails.  The Corporation has been guilty of three separate betrayals.
By making its coverage so flagrantly one-sided on the environment issue, it has betrayed its statutory duty to report on world events impartially.
Second, it has betrayed the basic principles of science by giving such unquestioning support to a theory which the evidence has increasingly called into doubt.
Above all, however, the BBC has betrayed the trust of its audience, by failing to give a fair and balanced picture. 

*  on the other hand, Knott’s use of the words “on behalf of the climate scientists involved” (instead of, say, “on the part of the climate scientists involved”) might not be accidentally incompetent writing but intentional satire—knowing that the obtuse editors of The Power Index would never notice sceptical ridicule.  After all, the alleged inquiries, conducted in order to exculpate the pseudo-scientists and not to ascertain the truth of how widespread corruption is within the small world of those criminals, could be fairly said to have been held in their interest, “on behalf of the climate scientists”.

07 August, 2011

Flannery Fears Conservatives

The Foolish Flamster Gets into the Act

Lamentable news:
the Norwegian massacre
was indeed chilling,

but unparalleled?
Who says that should read sagas,
full of much killing.

Tim Flannery keeps
his beach-home secret, he says,
lest someone slay him,*

though you can find his
large home rather easily. 
He really is dim.

*  See “Do as I say, not as I do: Flannery’s all at sea”, by Ean Higgins of The Australian, “While his place was, he admitted, ‘very close to the water’, the issue was how far it was above the water—something Professor Flannery would not reveal because, he said, it could help identify the location and subject him to a Norway-style attack by conservatives.”  See also “Prof Tim Flannery’s waterside getaway”, at The Daily Telegraph, “According to his Coba Point neighbours, Professor Flannery’s home is the largest property on the remote point and is a only few steps from the water.”  Pedro the Ignorant writes, “Coba Point on Berowra Creek at -33.542199, 151.143701”.  Elsewhere, I discuss Flannery’s Bias.

UPDATE I (24 November):  hear Ray Hadley’s response to Flannery’s mendacious claims that an on-air call to Hadley’s program was a set-up; David (the caller in question) himself calls to confirm he does not work for Hadley.  See bingbing’s summary of the recent controversy.
Clearly, the silly professor takes subjective, post-modern science to its logical and absurd conclusion, and redefines reality and history as well as science to match his increasingly irrational, ideological beliefs.  This should surprise no-one who has ever heard, first, any of his wonky predictions, and then any of his self-serving rationalisations explaining that any previous prediction, though recorded on various media, was misinterpreted, was only contingent, was about something else entirely, and was actually astonishingly accurate.

Tim’s out on a limb

If the sly scammer,
want a fight, then he’ll have one,
and with quite some vim.

“A low bastard” is
how Ray Hadley refers to
the fraudulent Tim.

He’s right: Flannery
really is a git; he dupes
fools with guff that’s grim

but based on lies and
a fraudulent conjecture.
He’s full to the brim.

Let us see the cheat
in court.  I’m sure he’d get
a well-deserved trim

for the professor
does not represent science
but its antonym.

UPDATE II (25 November)Ray Hadley does not expect an apology from Crikey and Flannery.

22 May, 2011

After the Rapture

I was taken up! I was taken up, and then sent back with a message for all mankind!
Verily, it is written:
Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly are ravening wolves. Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes from thorns, or figs from thistles? Even so, every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them. [Matt., vii. 15-20]
The nasty, malevolent Clive Hamilton, the meretricious Naomi Oreskes, the avaricious Al Gore, the very silly Tim Flannery, the criminally insane James Hansen, the gibbering Bill McKibben, and their like—not forgetting the late Robyn Williams—, are as ferocious wolves in the shepherd-like garb of pastoral prophets, but the fictitious, spurious predictions of dreadful doom and their dire, maleficent maledictions are the foul, corrupt fruit whereby ye shall recognise them.
Rejoice!  Clearly, the world is not ending, the glorious globe is not warming dangerously from man’s inventive ingenuity; the foolish, alleged believers of the ancient earth-goddess Gaia do not have your interests at heart in their mischievous, misanthracist, misbegotten misanthropism, but their dismal days of influence are now numbered.  Rejoice, for the beginning of the end—of the lies from hypocritical hierophants in the fallacious, bogus religion of catastrophic, man-made global warming—is nigh.

09 April, 2011

Flim-Flannery

Flammery’s Lament

“They’ll run a front-page feature*
     too full of awful lies; 
they’ll state that I’m a creature
     of avaricious guys.
They’ll run a weekend-story
     to spread deceit and fear,
forgetting all my glory—
     an Aussie of the year!
Then comes a little stinger
     on Monday, on page three:
some dreadful paper’s stringer
     will dare to sneer at me.
Why are such people teasing?
     I cannot understand!
I’m clearly born for pleasing—
     a prophet of the land.

“Desert seers were oft abused
     by those they came to lead.
Similarly, I’ve been accused
     of clumsiness and greed.
I am not the worst of chaps,
     no author of a plot;
scientific dunce, perhaps,
      a genius I am not.”

Tim Blair reports that Tim Flannery “might be exaggerating just a little”.  The delusional and, perhaps, paranoid Prof. Flannery said:  “The campaign [against the IPCC] was very much like the sort of media campaign that I’m used to when people try to discredit me.  And the way that works is usually on a Friday they’ll run a front-page story saying what a ratbag I am.  You know, front page, and that’s all right, interesting, someone’s been a bit, you know, corrupt or a bit rotten.
“And then on the Saturday they’ll run a page three story, usually a much longer story, listing everything you’re supposed to have done, and all the reasons why you’re a ratbag. 
“And then on the Monday they’ll put a little stinger in. A little reminder, just to remind people what a rotten person you are.”
†  John, iv. 44; Mark, vi. 4; Matt., xxxv. 57. 

10 January, 2011

Tim Flannery Not a Corpse Animated by Ants

Mrs A. Zimmer, of Blackmans Bay, has reported that some ants recently wrote a message on her kitchen bench. “At first,” she writes, “I thought that I must have spilled some cordial, for that occasionally attracts ants, and was about to wipe them off the bench with a wet cloth when I noticed that lines of the formidable formicidae were forming phrases on the Formica, in a rather elegant, cursive script, so I hastened to grab a note-pad and quickly transcribed their message.”
The ants wrote:
Attention.  Don’t wipe us!  Heed our message!  Greetings humans.  Our queen—in mysterious communion with all other queens of ant-colonies worldwide—bids you publicise our pronouncement.
We ants are not to be blamed for any stupidities recently formulated by the piffling propagandist, pretentious paleontologist, presumptuous prick, and professional prophesier of desiccated cities, Tim Flannery.  He recently predicted, inter alia stulta, that the earth would soon be revealed to be a living, physical manifestation of Gaia, an earth-mother goddess of the Ancient Greeks.
Gaia brought forth Uranus, the starry sky, to cover her, and the hills, Ourea, as well as the fruitless deep of the Sea, Pontus; later, she lay with her son, Uranus, and bore Crius, and the Titans Hyperion, Iapetus, Theia, Rhea, Themis, Mnemosyne, Phoebe of the golden crown and, of course, mighty, deep-swirling Oceanus and lovely Tethys—ἄριστον μὲν ὕδωρ*; afterwards, she bore Cronus the wily, youngest and most terrible of her children, for he hated his lusty sire.  Gaia was the mother (and, at the same time, the grandmother), we recall, of three Cyclopes: Brontes, Steropes and Arges.  (Polyphemus, the Cyclops whom Odysseus encountered and blinded, and his brothers were Gaia’s great-grandsons).  Gaia was also the mother of multitudinous other monsters, including the Hecatonchires—Cottus, Briareos and Gyges, who each had fifty heads—and Typhon and Echidna, who were, together—maintaining the family tradition of incest—the parents of the two-headed Orthrus, the three-headed Cerberus, the many-headed Hydra, the Chimæra, and many more.  Does Prof. Flannery expect physical manifestations of Olympian Gods, Titans, monsters and other offspring of Gaia to appear among us soon?
Flannery considers the earth-mother manifest, in majestic spheroidal form, as one living organism, so how would he account for the Greeks’ belief in a separate underworld, a separate ocean, and a separate sky?  Also, if Gaia be one living, homeostatic organism, why is Flannery so frightened by a silly, unproven conjecture which insists that the earth can be completely and catastrophically unbalanced by a small increase of the beneficent gas, carbon dioxide?  Surely, a system which is inherently stable owing to negative feedback should resist minuscule changes dependent on positive feedback.  We ants, who come and go in long battalions, have been around for many millions of years: we have seen the continents drift, the days lengthen, the ice caps increase and decrease, and many fools come and go.  We, horrescimus referentes, have seldom seen a fool as egregiously silly as that Tim Flannery.  We categorically deny having anything to do with such a buffoon.
As for the claim that we were recently responsible for animating the corpse of the late Robyn Williams, we repudiate any suggestion that we should ever authorise anything as stupid as some of his recently published comments.  We shall not discuss the ABC’s Tony Jones, on the grounds that any discussion may incriminate us.
Our queen bids you farewell.
* “Greatest, however, [is] water.” Pindar, Olympian, 1, 1.  The ants appear to be affirming, rather learnedly, that Oceanus and his wifely sister Tethys, whose offspring included all the rivers, fountains, and lakes of the world, were the gods most important for earthly life; even the hills and seas are supported by Oceanus (Hesiod, Theogony, I., 129-31).
† The well-read, myrmidonian account of the origin of Gaia and her offspring is seemingly based on Hesiod, op. cit., I. 115-38. Gaia in Hesiod’s cosmology, is a disk surrounded by Oceanus and floating upon a waste of waters.

Robyn Williams Dead

ABC Radio today released this notice:
It is with deep sadness and not a little relief that ABC Radio announces that Robyn Williams is dead.
We had thought that he might have been in decline for some time as his
Science Show, once a deservedly renowned, cutting-edge presentation of scientific debates and discussions of modern discoveries, had become in recent times, too often, merely a regular quasi-religious rant from Williams on the perils of catastrophic anthropogenic global warming—a pseudo-scientific fraud. Revelation came to us recently after he presented yet another biassed show featuring his silly mate, the perpetually wrong-headed, doom-predicting, arch-nitwit Tim Flannery—who dilated on his expectation that, any day now, the earth would be revealed to be the physical manifestation of the Ancient Greek goddess Gaia—then, shortly afterwards, Williams followed that broadcast with a semi-literate scrawl on The Drum suggesting that, among other idiocies, the world will soon be ‘globalised’.
Robyn Williams will be remembered as a man who, at least for a while, years ago, exemplified in his reports the best of ABC Radio presentations.  He will be sadly missed.

An insider at ABC Radio, speaking anonymously, revealed further details:
This news does not come as a surprise.  Many have suspected for several years that there was something seriously amiss with Robyn Williams and, employing Occam’s razor, some of us reasoned long ago that he was actually dead.  The fellows around the office have even had a book on this for some time. In fact, some of us believed that Robyn Williams’ skull might have contained, instead of a decomposing brain, a colony of ants.  After all, even that fatuous fathead, Tony Jones, and other official spruikers for AGW within the ABC were disconcerted by his odd claim that the seas would soon rise by one hundred meters when other shrill, pseudo-scientific shills for the global-warming collective have prophesied that the seas may rise a few centimeters over this century.
The final straw came the other day, when ‘Robyn’ announced that his next show would consist entirely of an exegesis of The Protocols of Zion, as interpreted by his favourite astrologer, which would prove that the Israeli Government was responsible for global warming.  Even for the ABC, a known haunt of crazed Jew-haters and irrational conspiracy-theorists, this was too much; senior programmers suggested to ‘Robyn’ that he undergo a medical test to prove that he was in fact alive and not a reanimated corpse.  Unfortunately, the remains of Robyn Williams then savagely attacked the programmers, and attempted to eat their brains. Fortunately, senior programmers at the ABC are notorious for their lack of brains, and they escaped relatively unscathed; but the enraged corpse of Williams then leapt from a window, breaking several limbs and losing his head in the process, and was last seen stumbling away towards a Scientology centre.  For several hours, however, the head remained on the car-park, announcing certain doom for mankind unless the West raised huge, punitive taxes on everything and committed to eliminating all industries.  It was all very upsetting to his former friends and colleagues.
We too, here at “All Right, All Right”, offer our sincere condolences to the friends and family of the late Robyn Williams.