The Fairfax Media Charter of Editorial Independence

Journalists of Fairfax newspapers—The Age, Sunday Age, Sydney Morning Herald, and Australian Financial Review, &c.—would, because of their selfless devotion to sound principles of fair-minded journalism, insist that any new member of the Fairfax Media board subscribe to The Fairfax Media Charter of Editorial Independence, which includes such clauses as:

1. That the proprietor(s) publicly declare a commitment to the fundamental and longstanding principle of editorial independence.

2. That the proprietor(s) acknowledge that journalists, artists and photographers must record the affairs of the city, state, nation and the world fairly, fully and regardless of any commercial, political or personal interests, including those of any proprietors, shareholders or board members.

Cynical readers of the various Fairfax newspapers might well ask, “when did the journalists ever ‘record the affairs of the city, state, nation and the world fairly’?”  Nonetheless, the present clauses have been deemed insufficient, I hear, in light of the likelihood that the rather wealthy Mrs. Gina Rinehart, who now owns a few shares of Fairfax Media, and reckons that she is somehow entitled to protect her investment prudently, might seek representation on the said board; accordingly, journalists have added several new clauses to the charter, including the following:

Any new board-member, and particularly one who might own mining corporations in addition to Fairfax Media shares, must hereby agree to ‘uphold values’ without questioning too deeply what those values might be.

Any new board-member, and particularly one who might own mining corporations in addition to Fairfax Media shares, must hereby approve of journalists’ standard assumption, to be regularly expressed in columns and articles, that—apart from some of the ever dwindling number of enlightened readers of Fairfax newspapers—ordinary Australian citizens are ignorant, racialist, sexist, misophilomophylist bigots.

Any new board-member, and particularly one who might own mining corporations in addition to Fairfax Media shares, must hereby agree to allow vicious attacks in Fairfax newspapers on the Republic of Israel, and its citizens and supporters, whilst condoning related acts of terror and praising all those who are committed to destroying Israel and its citizens and supporters.

Any new board-member, and particularly one who might own mining corporations in addition to Fairfax Media shares, must hereby agree to allow the continuing demonisation of mining corporations and their owners and their profitable ventures in Fairfax newspapers.

Any new board-member, and particularly one who might own mining corporations in addition to Fairfax Media shares, must hereby agree to continue the funding of “Earth Hour” and other propaganda for “climate change action”.
Any new board-member, and particularly one who might own mining corporations in addition to Fairfax Media shares, must hereby agree to ensure only unstinting praise of any Labor government or ALP policy in Fairfax newspapers, except when The Greens and other “progressive” parties have already opposed a particular government or policy.

UPDATE:  I learn from reliable sources—all right, from Twitter—that journalists have several cogent reasons to oppose Mrs. Rinehart’s ownership of Fairfax: