In a Senate committee, Sen. Sarah Hanson-Young insists that the Department of Immigration and Border Protection should stop using neuralyzers on illegal aliens to wipe their memories, and asks some hard-hitting questions:-
Sen. Sarah Hanson-Young: I’ve been watching quite a few television programmes lately, just for purposes of research, mind, and it seems that we don’t even need to use old-fashioned ships any more because we can travel even into outer space using Transporter beams, and into other planets using a rediscovered technological apparatus, which the ancient Egyptian rulers used, called “Stargate”. So, my first question is: why isn’t Big Ted from “Playschool” here today to answer questions when I’m sure I put him on my witness list; and why isn’t Squadron Leader, I mean Lance Corporal, of course, or, no, why isn’t Brigadier Sir Alistair Lethbridge-Stewart here to tell us whether aliens really do pose a threat to our borders, and just how many Daleks are left in the universe (because I’m pretty sure I insisted that UNIT release him for this inquiry); and—
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| RAN personnel preparing to use neuralysers on unlawful aliens seeking illegal entry |
UPDATE I: to assist Sen. Hanson-Young, here’s a list of border-related entertainment she might have been trying to remember:
UPDATE II (4 February): Sen. Hanson-Young has complained to The Daily Telegraph:“Border Patrol” is a reality television series from New Zealand which features the work of New Zealand’s Customs, Ministry of Agriculture and Forestry, and Immigration Service—the show has no connection with the Australian Department of Immigration and Border Protection;
“Border Security: Australia’s Front Line” is the Australian reality television series which features the work of officers of Australian Customs and Border Protection, the Australian Quarantine and Inspection Service, and the Department of Immigration and Border Protection;
“Border Watch” is an adventure module for the rôle-playing game Dungeons & Dragons—the game has no connection with the Australian Department of Immigration and Border Protection; The Border Watch is a newspaper based in Mount Gambier, South Australia—the newspaper has no connection with the Australian Department of Immigration and Border Protection;
“Coastwatch” is a reality television series from New Zealand which features the work of New Zealand’s Ministry of Fisheries, Maritime Police, Coastguard, Navy, Air Force and police dive squad—the show has no connection with the Australian Department of Immigration and Border Protection;
“Coastwatch Oz” is a reality television series from New South Wales which features the work of NSW’s Department of Primary Industries fisheries officers and Marine Area Command Police—the show has no connection with the Australian Department of Immigration and Border Protection;
“Patrol Boat” was an Australian television drama series—i.e. it was not quite real—which featured the activities of the crew of a Royal Australian Navy patrol boat patrolling Australia's coastline—the show (produced, in 1979 and 1983) had no connection with the Australian Department of Immigration and Border Protection; and
“Sea Patrol” was an Australian television drama series—i.e. it was not quite real—which ran from 2007 to 2011, set on board HMAS Hammersley, a fictional patrol boat of the Royal Australian Navy—the show had no connection with the Australian Department of Immigration and Border Protection.
I am writing to comment on the article printed in the Daily Telegraph on Monday, 3 February 2014.To set the record straight, my line of questioning was in regard to the Channel 7 program ‘Border Security’ and the same channel’s new reality show ‘Coastwatch Oz’. I was simply pointing out the fact that the government is promoting and publicising the activities of border security operations on the one hand while, on the other hand, refusing to answer questions about illegal operations it is undertaking on the high seas.It was Mike Pezzullo, CEO of the Australian Customs and Border Protection Service, who raised the television program ‘Sea Patrol’, about which I made no reference.While I know it’s unlikely that the Daily Telegraph columnist will check his facts with me in the future, I will continue to point out the dangerous and secretive nature of this government’s policies.
Sen. Hanson-Young had said in the Senate’s committee hearing, “We have a TV show publicising techniques you are using for border security at airports. We have another TV show, of course, about coastguards.” The show “about coastguards”, which she now identifies as “Coastwatch Oz”, features NSW Department of Primary Industries fisheries officers and Marine Area Command Police without input from the Department of Immigration and Border Protection. Personnel of the Royal Australian Navy differ from NSW fisheries and police officers but, to be fair to the inaccurate senator, they all wear uniforms.
What the senator terms “illegal operations” on “the high seas” are operations which comply with Australian and international laws and they are, accordingly, perfectly legal; however, to be fair to the erroneous senator, the non-citizens wilfully trying to enter Australia in contravention of Australian and international laws (whom RAN personnel have been encountering and assisting professionally and humanely) are in fact involved in “illegal operations”.
UPDATE III (5 February): Sen. Hanson-Young’s grasp of reality might be well represented by her choice of pictures:
UPDATE III (5 February): Sen. Hanson-Young’s grasp of reality might be well represented by her choice of pictures:
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| her profile picture on Twitter |
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| her reality v. her fantasy (from the last election campaign) |
Dr. Bandt: We call for an end to bourgeois, left-fascism and deviationism!
Sen. Rhiannon: Heh-heh heh! We need to expel from the party those members who reject the conditions and theses laid down by the central committee! Heh-heh! Talking of the all-powerful central committee, the leadership—
Dr. Bandt: I vote for Adam Bandt.
Sen. Siewert: I vote for Rachel Siewert.
Sen. Ludlam: I vote for Senator Ludlum.
Sen. Di Natale: I vote for me.
Sen. Waters: I vote for Senator Waters.
Sen. Hanson-Young: Ooh, I vote for me!
Sen. Wright: No, me!
Sen. Milne: I vote for Bob.
Sen. Brown: In that case, I have two votes and remain leader. Now, assuming that each of you will vote for yourself for deputy—
omnes: Yes, of course.
Sen. Brown: I vote for Senator Milne, who thus remains deputy leader. Right, on with business. We have the balance of power in the Senate whenever the Government and the Coalition are opposed. What shall we concentrate our efforts on accomplishing? What should we announce first?
Sen. Milne: No coal-fired power stations!
Sen. Siewert: Ban abattoirs!
Sen. Di Natale: Make the swinish multitude exercise more!
Sen. Wright: Tell people what is good for them! At the moment, the suburbs are full of ignorant racists who eat the wrong food, read the wrong newspapers, watch the wrong television shows—
Sen. Ludlam: Supporters of nuclear energy must be demonised! Defame sceptics—
Sen. Waters: Accuse anyone doubtful of global warming or against taxing the air we breathe of being ignorant, suburban trash in the pay of big oil—
Sen. Milne: We already do all that—
Dr. Bandt: Systematic and methodical agitation is necessary throughout the suburbs—
Sen. Rhiannon: Liver of blaspheming Jew! First, you loony Leninist, all the party’s publishing institutions must be subordinated to the party leadership—
Dr. Bandt: Look, you Stalinist hag, an entirely classless, stateless form of society—
Sen. Rhiannon: Fair is foul, and foul is fair! Heh-heh heh! We must arrange a boycott of all Jewish, I mean, Israeli businesses, and then we must regularly and methodically remove reformists and centrists—
Sen. Hanson-Young: Please don’t shout! It makes Teddy nervous.
Dr. Bandt: Look, I support Palestinians as much—
Sen. Rhiannon: The Jews are responsible—
Sen. Brown: Umm—
Sen. Rhiannon: You cursed brat! Look what you’ve done! I’m melting! melting!
Sen. Brown: Someone, anyone, Sarah wet herself again; and judging from the smell, Senator Rhiannon needs her nappy changed.
Sen. Rhiannon: Ah, my pretties! Heh-heh heh!
Sen. Brown: Adam, please, their assistants know what to do; take them to their offices, quickly.
Sen. Hanson-Young: Is Saint Peter the tutelar saint of Cadiz?
Sen. Rhiannon: Ah, the devil is come among you, having great wrath. Heh-heh heh.
Dr. Bandt: Come on!